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There are reasons we fear the night. He isn't one of them. Bill Ryder was a dateless dweeb...then he died. Unfortunately for him that was just the beginning of his troubles. He awoke to find himself a vampire, one of the legendary predators of the night. Unfortunately for him, he was still at the bottom of the food chain. Now he finds himself surrounded by creatures stronger, deadlier and a whole lot cooler than he is. Worst yet, they all want him dead...permanently this time. Bill isn't exactly average, though. A vampire like him hasn't been seen in centuries. He's got a few tricks up his sleeve, unlikely allies, and an attitude problem that makes him too damn obnoxious to quit. Join him in this hilarious tale of monsters, mayhem, and the unlikely hero who's not afraid to tell them all off...even if it gets his teeth kicked in. ********** Bill the Vampire (the Tome of Bill, part 1) is 80k words of foul-mouthed horror comedy by Rick Gualtieri, author of Scary Dead Things (The Tome of Bill, part 2) and Bigfoot Hunters.
“The funniest science fiction book ever written” is a space military parody about a hapless soldier from a Science Fiction Hall of Fame inductee (Terry Pratchett, New York Times–bestselling author of the Discworld novels). It was the highest honour to defend the Empire against the dreaded Chingers, an enemy race of seven-foot-tall lizards. But Bill, a Technical Fertilizer Operator from a planet of farmers, wasn’t interested in honour—he was only interested in two things: his chosen career, and the shapely curves of Inga-Maria Calyphigia. Then a recruiting robot shanghaied him with knockout drops, and he came to in deep space, aboard the Empire warship Christine Keeler. And from there, things got even worse . . . Praise for Harry Harrison “A perfectly grand storyteller.” —David Brin, Hugo and Nebula Award–winning author of Star Tide Rising “Few commercial writers are more deserving of their popularity than Harrison, a fine writer who occasionally reaches brilliant heights.” —Publishers Weekly
THE FINAL NOVEL IN THE #1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING SOOKIE STACKHOUSE SERIES—the inspiration for the HBO® original series True Blood. When a shocking murder rocks the small town of Bon Temps, Louisiana, psychic cocktail waitress Sookie Stackhouse learns that she has more than one enemy waiting to get vengeance for the past. Beacuse nothing is ever clear-cut in Bon Temps. What passes for truth is only a convenient lie. What passes for justice is more spilled blood. And what passes for love is never enough...
"New York Times"-bestselling author Harris has delighted fans with her mystery series featuring small-town waitress-turned-paranormal sleuth Sookie Stackhouse. "Dead Until Dark" is her first novel in the series.
Bon Temps’s psychic waitress takes a dangerous road trip in the third novel in the #1 New York Times bestselling Sookie Stackhouse series—the inspiration for the HBO® original series True Blood. There’s only one vampire Sookie Stackhouse is involved with (at least voluntarily) and it’s Bill Compton. But recently he’s been a little distant—in another state, distant. Then his sinister and sexy boss Eric Northman tells Sookie where she might find him. Next thing she knows, she’s off to Jackson, Mississippi, to mingle with the under-underworld at Club Dead, a dangerous little haunt where the elite of vampire society can go to chill out and suck down some Type-O. But when Sookie finally finds Bill—caught in an act of serious betrayal—she’s not sure whether to save him...or sharpen some stakes.
At the edge of chaos, one geek stands tall. Five years ago, dateless dork Bill Ryder somehow saved the world, banishing magic and monsters to the shadows. He thought it was over, that he was finished with that life. Too bad for him, shit's about to get surreal again. Now the impossible has happened. His goddaughter is conjuring fireballs from thin air and two vampires have shown up at his doorstep looking to kick his ass. A crazed group of ex-wizards are hell-bent on forcing the door between worlds open, intent on letting the nightmares back in, and only Bill and his friends stand in their way. Join him in this hilarious tale of a world teetering on the brink of anarchy and the unlikely hero who's not afraid to look the madness in the eye and flip it both fingers.
When a vampire asks Sookie Stackhouse to use her telepathic skills to find another missing vampire, she agrees under one condition: the bloodsuckers must promise to let the humans go unharmed. Easier said than done.
Terror lurks below and it's about to surface. The end of the world is rapidly approaching, but Bill Ryder - gamer, geek, and legendary vampire - finds himself with more pressing concerns to worry about: the women in his life. Sidelined from action, he's forced to reevaluate his feelings. Sadly for him, it's a luxury he can ill afford. An unstoppable terror from the dawn of time has awoken deep beneath the Earth and is headed his way. To make matters worse, he's been deemed a traitor by those he thought to be his allies. Now he finds himself fighting off enemies from all sides while warring with his emotions. Talk about sucky timing for introspection. As the world crumbles to pieces around him, Bill must muster his courage, master his powers, and rise to the destiny he's been trying so long to deny - because if he doesn't, his love life will be the least of his worries. *** Half-a-Prayer (the Tome of Bill, part 6) is 130k words of foul-mouthed Urban Fantasy by Rick Gualtieri, author of Holier Than Thou and Sunset Strip
There are reasons we fear the night. He STILL isn't one of them. Bill Ryder, the trash-talking undead geek from Bill the Vampire, is back and about to find himself in a whole new world of side-splitting insanity. One of the most powerful vampires on the planet has given Bill a death sentence. Meanwhile, an immortal princess wants him for an entirely different purpose, one which makes his first issue seem almost preferable. All the while, new and powerful forces have begun to emerge from the shadows around him. Are they friend or foe? Knowing his luck, do you even have to ask? Bill's only hope is to marshal his friends, master his powers, and somehow prove that he's the scariest dead thing of them all. ********** Scary Dead Things (The Tome of Bill, part 2) is 80,000 words of foul-mouthed horror comedy by Rick Gualtieri, author of Bill the Vampire and Bigfoot Hunters.
There are reasons we fear the night. Now he must become one of them. Bill Ryder has a powerful destiny. He just never expected it to involve an amnesiac bloodsucker, a bunch of D&D dorks, and a hormonal witch. It's time for the gamer, geek, and legendary vampire to embrace his fate. Ordered to storm the vampire stronghold in Boston, Bill must approach the doorstep of the invincible undead warlord he's destined to face. It's his only chance of stopping Armageddon. As his enemies stand in his way and his allies falter, the vicious beast inside of him wants out. If he stands tall and faces his fate, the world might just have a chance of surviving. If he fails, an unquenchable evil will destroy everything Bill knows and loves. Why can't the end of the world ever be easy?