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Time for the Machine Republic to Kurl Up and Dye It’s a year since the Battlestar Suburbia broke free from Earth and the human rebellion is hiding out in the asteroid belt. Their leader, Admiral Janice, is assembling a fleet she hopes can topple robot rule – except on Wednesday afternoons when she can do you a half head of highlights for 30 quid. Janice has given Darren, now the reluctant captain of the teenage starship Polari, a critical mission, to open up a path back to Earth by bombing the Martian Gap Services. But when it goes wrong and Darren and his crew are chased deep into the solar system, Janice has only one hope left, back on Earth. Here, sentient breadmaker Pamasonic Teffal is resisting the human–machine war the best way she knows how: by running for office. Until a distress signal from Janice persuades her to get her turbo-charged alter ego Pam Van Damme out of mothballs, that is... Can Pam save the solar system and rescue Kelly from the clutches of her nemesis, the crazed smartphone-turned-cyborg, Sonny Erikzon? Find out in another anarchic comic adventure from the inimitable Chris McCrudden. What readers are saying: “I loved this book. I legit laughed through the entire novel and I am excited that there will be a sequel.” Terra C “A brilliant mix of sci-fi, humor, and those hundreds of little things that make a memorable story. McCrudden is destined to become synonymous with great sci-fi humor.” Christopher H “A deliciously hilarious romp which skirts the realms of credibility but provides a wild ride which kept me very much entertained throughout. It's bonkers, it's mad and .... so exaggerated to almost be genius in its execution.” Kath B “Featuring a kindly bread-maker, ancient nana-cyborgs, a moving hairdressers and a chance to avert a nuclear bomb, it's both great fun and very clever.” Ruth M “Battlestar Suburbia highlights the absurdity of life, and the adaptability of individuals in unusual situations. McCrudden’s novel will appeal to fans of Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett, or anyone looking for an escape only loosely connected to reality.” Stephenie S “This was a trip! Some great one-lines & puns help create this future world where the machines have taken over. With evil smartphones, anti-hero humans, & a motherly bread maker pushed to the edge...” Caroline F Editorial reviews: “Chris McCrudden has created a new division of SF: Science Flotsam. His sprawling space epic is what you get if you cross Dr Who with an unhealthy fascination for household appliances. Forget alien invasion; in this explosive future you won’t be able to trust your spin dryer.” Christopher Fowler “McCrudden’s debut is festooned with cunning punnery, sharp turns of phrase, and jokes about emojis and the internet, making this very much a comic novel of our times.” James Lovegrove, Financial Times “an amusing and mind-bending read... different, a little geeky, and lots of fun.” LoveReading “An extraordinary technical achievement that does for SF what Terry Pratchett did for fantasy.” David Quantick
In space, no one can hear you clean... When Darren’s charge-cart gets knocked off the Earth-to-Mars highway and lost in space forever, he thinks his day can’t get any worse. When Kelly sees Darren accidentally short-circuit a talking lamppost, and its camera captures her face as it expires, she thinks her day can’t get any worse. When Pamasonic Teffal, a sentient breadmaker, is sent on a top-secret mission into the depths of the internet and betrayed by her boss, a power-crazed smartphone, she knows this is only the beginning of a day that isn’t going to get any better. Join Darren, Kelly and Pam in an anarchic comic adventure that takes them from the shining skyscrapers of Singulopolis to the sewers of the Dolestar Discovery, and find out what happens when a person puts down their mop and bucket and says ‘No.’ Battlestar Suburbia will be loved by fans of Douglas Adams, Terry Pratchett and Jasper Fforde, as well as anyone who’s ever wondered just how long someone can stay under one of those old-fashioned hairdryers.* *The answer is: a really very, very long time. What readers are saying: “I loved this book. I legit laughed through the entire novel and I am excited that there will be a sequel.” Terra C “A brilliant mix of sci-fi, humor, and those hundreds of little things that make a memorable story. McCrudden is destined to become synonymous with great sci-fi humor.” Christopher H “A deliciously hilarious romp which skirts the realms of credibility but provides a wild ride which kept me very much entertained throughout. It's bonkers, it's mad and .... so exaggerated to almost be genius in its execution.” Kath B “Featuring a kindly bread-maker, ancient nana-cyborgs, a moving hairdressers and a chance to avert a nuclear bomb, it's both great fun and very clever.” Ruth M “Battlestar Suburbia highlights the absurdity of life, and the adaptability of individuals in unusual situations. McCrudden’s novel will appeal to fans of Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett, or anyone looking for an escape only loosely connected to reality.” Stephenie S “This was a trip! Some great one-lines & puns help create this future world where the machines have taken over. With evil smartphones, anti-hero humans, & a motherly bread maker pushed to the edge...” Caroline F “Chris McCrudden has created a new division of SF: Science Flotsam. His sprawling space epic is what you get if you cross Dr Who with an unhealthy fascination for household appliances. Forget alien invasion; in this explosive future you won’t be able to trust your spin dryer.” Christopher Fowler “McCrudden’s debut is festooned with cunning punnery, sharp turns of phrase, and jokes about emojis and the internet, making this very much a comic novel of our times.” James Lovegrove, Financial Times “an amusing and mind-bending read... different, a little geeky, and lots of fun.” LoveReading
The third hilarious instalment of the anarchic Battlestar Suburbia series The only thing harder to win than a war is the peace that follows it... Six months after the end of hostilities that pitted man against robot, both machines and humans are still struggling to work out how they’ll share custody of the solar system. Down on Earth, prime minister Fuji Itsu should really be dealing with that - and the planet’s crumbling concrete crust – but now she’s fallen through it and her chief-of-staff has lost her backup disk. Up in space, acting first minister Janice has only one hope of protecting the eight million people on the Battlestar Suburbia. That means sending an ultra-secret mission made up of two ill-matched beauticians to infiltrate an interplanetary smuggling ring. Somewhere in between, a smartphone with an agenda that not even he understands is supposed to bring these two sides together. Both robots and humans learn that the answers to – and possibly the causes of – all their problems lie not in space but under their feet. It’s time for toasters and fleshies alike to Sashay to the Centre of the Earth. What readers are saying: “I loved this book. I legit laughed through the entire novel and I am excited that there will be a sequel.” Terra C “A brilliant mix of sci-fi, humor, and those hundreds of little things that make a memorable story. McCrudden is destined to become synonymous with great sci-fi humor.” Christopher H “A deliciously hilarious romp which skirts the realms of credibility but provides a wild ride which kept me very much entertained throughout. It's bonkers, it's mad and .... so exaggerated to almost be genius in its execution.” Kath B “Featuring a kindly bread-maker, ancient nana-cyborgs, a moving hairdressers and a chance to avert a nuclear bomb, it's both great fun and very clever.” Ruth M “Battlestar Suburbia highlights the absurdity of life, and the adaptability of individuals in unusual situations. McCrudden’s novel will appeal to fans of Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett, or anyone looking for an escape only loosely connected to reality.” Stephenie S “This was a trip! Some great one-lines & puns help create this future world where the machines have taken over. With evil smartphones, anti-hero humans, & a motherly bread maker pushed to the edge...” Caroline F Editorial reviews: “Chris McCrudden has created a new division of SF: Science Flotsam. His sprawling space epic is what you get if you cross Dr Who with an unhealthy fascination for household appliances. Forget alien invasion; in this explosive future you won’t be able to trust your spin dryer.” Christopher Fowler “McCrudden’s debut is festooned with cunning punnery, sharp turns of phrase, and jokes about emojis and the internet, making this very much a comic novel of our times.” James Lovegrove, Financial Times “an amusing and mind-bending read... different, a little geeky, and lots of fun.” LoveReading “An extraordinary technical achievement that does for SF what Terry Pratchett did for fantasy.” David Quantick
New York Times bestselling author and six-time WWE champion Chris Jericho shares 20 of his most valuable lessons for achieving your goals and living the life you want. Chris Jericho has known what he wanted out of life since he was a teenager: to be a pro wrestler and to be in a rock 'n' roll band. Most of his high school friends felt that he lacked the tools necessary to get into either, but Chris believed in himself. With the wise words of Master Yoda echoing through his head ("Do or do not. There is no try."), he made it happen. As a result, Chris has spent a lifetime doing instead of merely trying, managing to achieve his dreams while learning dozens of invaluable lessons along the way. No Is a Four-Letter Word distills more than two decades of showbiz wisdom and advice into twenty easy-to-carry chapters, including: Developing a strong work ethic thanks to WWE chairman Vince McMahon, Remembering to always look like a star from Gene Simmons of KISS, Learning to let it go when the America's Funniest Home Videos hosting gig goes to his rival, Adopting a sense of perpetual reinvention from the late David Bowie, Making sure to sell himself like his NHL-legend father Ted Irvine taught him, and Going the extra mile to meet Keith Richards (with an assist from Jimmy Fallon). Now, in the hopes that those same principles might help and inspire his legions of fans, Chris has decided to share them while recounting the fantastic and hilarious stories that led to the birth of these rules. The result is a fun, entertaining, practical, and inspiring book from the man with many scarves but only one drive: to be the best. After reading No Is a Four-Letter Word, you'll discover that you might have what it takes to succeed as well...you just need to get out there and do it. That's what Jericho would do.
"But there is a different, unexpected answer to the riddle. Lorili and Kyal will have to fight for their theory - and their lives."--BOOK JACKET.
For the first time New York Times bestselling author Christopher Rice writes as C. Travis Rice. Under his new pen name, Rice offers tales of passion, intrigue, and steamy romance between men. The first novel, SAPPHIRE SUNSET, transports you to a beautiful luxury resort on the sparkling Southern California coast where strong-willed heroes release the shame that blocks their heart's desires. Logan Murdoch is a fighter, a survivor, and a provider. When he leaves a distinguished career in the Marine Corps to work security at a luxury beachfront resort, he’s got one objective: pay his father’s mounting medical bills. That means Connor Harcourt, the irresistibly handsome scion of the wealthy family that owns Sapphire Cove, is strictly off limits, despite his sassy swagger and beautiful blue eyes. Logan’s life is all about sacrifices; Connor is privilege personified. But temptation is a beast that demands to be fed, and a furtive kiss ignites instant passion, forcing Logan to slam the brakes. Hard. Haunted by their frustrated attraction, the two men find themselves hurled back together when a headline-making scandal threatens to ruin the resort they both love. This time, there’s no easy escape from the magnetic pull of their white hot desire. Will saving Sapphire Cove help forge the union they crave, or will it drive them apart once more?
The last member of a murdered House tries to protect his ward from forced marriage to a monster while uncovering clues to his own tortured past. The Tarot Sequence imagines a modern-day Atlantis off the coast of Massachusetts, governed by powerful Courts based on the traditional Tarot deck. Rune Saint John, last child of the fallen Sun Throne, is backed into a fight of high court magic and political appetites in a desperate bid to protect his ward, Max, from a forced marital alliance with the Hanged Man. Rune's resistance will take him to the island's dankest corners, including a red light district made of moored ghost ships; a surreal skyscraper farm; and the floor of the ruling Convocation, where a gathering of Arcana will change Rune's life forever.
Full of imagination, wit, and random sh*t flying through the air, this insane adventure from an irreverent new voice will blow your tiny mind. For Teagan Frost, sh*t just got real. Teagan Frost is having a hard time keeping it together. Sure, she's got telekinetic powers -- a skill that the government is all too happy to make use of, sending her on secret break-in missions that no ordinary human could carry out. But all she really wants to do is kick back, have a beer, and pretend she's normal for once. But then a body turns up at the site of her last job -- murdered in a way that only someone like Teagan could have pulled off. She's got 24 hours to clear her name - and it's not just her life at stake. If she can't unravel the conspiracy in time, her hometown of Los Angeles will be in the crosshairs of an underground battle that's on the brink of exploding . . .
In this debut novel and series starter, the last member of a murdered House searches for a missing nobleman, and uncovers clues about his own tortured past. Rune Saint John, last child of the fallen Sun Court, is hired to search for Lady Judgment's missing son, Addam, on New Atlantis, the island city where the Atlanteans moved after ordinary humans destroyed their original home. With his companion and bodyguard, Brand, he questions Addam's relatives and business contacts through the highest ranks of the nobles of New Atlantis. But as they investigate, they uncover more than a missing man: a legendary creature connected to the secret of the massacre of Rune's Court. In looking for Addam, can Rune find the truth behind his family's death and the torments of his past?
'I wonder if you can have a boyfriend and be a feminist. I might just google it.' Kat doesn't know much about feminism, but she does know it's confusing - just like everything else in her life. Utterly hilarious and boldly honest, Kat tells it how it is - and it is INCREDIBLY embarrassing. Perfect for those who love Holly Bourne and Sex Education. 15-year-old Kat wants to do GOOD FEMINISM, although she's not always sure what that means. She also wants to be a writer, get together with Hot Josh (is this a feminist ambition?), win at her coursework and not make a TOTAL EMBARRASSMENT of herself at all times. But the path to true feminism is filled with mortifying incidents, muddling moments and Instagram hell. And it doesn't help that Hot Josh is just, well, properly, distractingly hot. And when everything at school starts to get a bit too much, Kat knows she's lost her way, and the only way forward is to ask for help ... Bold, authentic and laugh-out-loud funny, Kat's diary fearlessly navigates her way through life, love and teenage anxiety. 'Holly Bourne fans should love this uproarious debut by standup comic Weston' Guardian 'This book will make you laugh out loud' - Sunday Times Book of the Week