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When it comes to adultery, never say, “It won’t happen to me.” Just when you think your marriage is safe from adultery is when you may be the most vulnerable. With eye-opening stories, clinical insights, and up-to-date data, Dave Carder reveals what adulterers learned the hard way—and what they want the rest of us to know to save us the pain. Dave Carder, counselor and author of the bestselling Torn Asunder (100,000 in print), is a sought-after expert on issues of adultery. Here he helps you make your marriage adultery-proof by showing you: How attractions can lead to affairs Ways you may be vulnerable to affairs The common ingredients of adultery How to restore intimacy to your marriage How to make wise, protective decisions Marriage is too sacred to be taken casually. Affairs are a very real threat, and they can destroy lives and families. For this reason, Anatomy of an Affair should be on every church leader’s and marriage counselor’s required reading list, and in the home of every married couple. Includes charts and assessments to understand and guard against affairs. This book is the revised edition of Close Calls (2008)
Never say never; because just when you think your marriage is safe from adultery is when you may be the most vulnerable. Dave Carder, counselor, author of the bestselling Torn Asunder (100,000 in print), and a sought-after expert on issues of adultery. Now, with eye-opening stories, clinical insights, and up-to-date data, he reveals what adulterers learned the hard way- and want the rest of us to know. For example, every spouse has a "Dangerous Partner Profile" of the kind of person who tempts them. Close Calls should be on every church leader's and marriage counselor's required reading list. Includes charts and assessments.
Steve Judah explores the phenomenon of infidelity, considering both the push of marital discord and the pull of sexual temptation. With clear and helpful analysis of the relational science behind infidelity, he delivers a tested way back toward a meaningful marriage.
There is hope for recovery from the devastation of extramarital affairs. In "Torn Asunder," Carder provides an overall recovery process from sexual and non-sexual affairs.
One of the world’s leading experts on infidelity provides a step-by-step guide through the process of infidelity—from suspicion and revelation to healing, and provides profound, practical guidance to prevent infidelity and, if it happens, recover and heal from it. You’re right to be cautious when you hear these words: “I’m telling you, we’re just friends.” Good people in good marriages are having affairs. The workplace and the Internet have become fertile breeding grounds for “friendships” that can slowly and insidiously turn into love affairs. Yet you can protect your relationship from emotional or sexual betrayal by recognizing the red flags that mark the stages of slipping into an improper, dangerous intimacy that can threaten your marriage.
"A fresh look at infidelity, broadening the focus from the havoc it wreaks within a committed relationship to consider also why people do it, what it means to them, and why breaking up is the expected response to duplicity — but not necessarily the wisest one.” — LA Review of Books From iconic couples’ therapist and bestselling author of Mating in Captivity comes a provocative and controversial look at infidelity with practical, honest, and empathetic advice for how to move beyond it. An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboo—universally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheat—even those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book. For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriage—with the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart. Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationships—what we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations. Fiercely intelligent, The State of Affairs provides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, “Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.”
Based on the principles in the bestselling Torn Asunder—a book that has helped thousands of people survive infidelity—this revised and expanded workbook offers five crucial services for hurting couples: Stabilizes the marriage in the initial crisis Provides structure for the emotionally volatile environment Brings closure to the "old" marriage—the marriage prior to the affair Establishes skills necessary for the "new" marriage pattern Answers the questions: How could you do this to me? Why did you do it? The Torn Asunder workbook is built around daily twenty-minute homework exercises, initiated by each spouse on alternating days for ten to fifteen weeks. Working with your spouse might be the last thing you want to do right now, but it’s essential to your long-term recovery, whether or not your marriage survives. Healing won’t be easy. But the Torn Asunder workbook provides hope, encouragement, and practical advice for the journey. Take the first step today.
After the Affair teaches partners how to heal themselves and grow from the shattering crisis of an infidelity. Drawing on thirty-five years as a clinical psychologist, Dr. Spring offers a series of original and proven strategies that address such questions as: Why did it happen? Once love and trust are gone, can we ever get them back? Can I—should I—recommit when I feel so ambivalent? How do we become sexually intimate again? Is forgiveness possible? What constitutes an affair in cyberspace?
A thoughtfully written and sensitive guide for anyone dealing with the devastating effects of an affair. For anyone who has been impacted by an affair, the effects can be nothing short of devastating. Licensed clinical psychologist Dr. Liz Currin has years of experience helping couples resolve and repair the damage wrought by the effects of an affair. Through Dr Currin's thoughtful style, readers of The Essential Guide to Surviving Infidelity will learn how affairs start, what to do if a partner is suspected of cheating, how to deal with the emotional impact of an affair, and many other essential steps in the healing process. In addition, Dr. Currin provides clears guideposts to healing a marriage (as well as oneself), moving on, engaging the power of forgiveness, and restoring trust.