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Geoff Thompson was sexually abused at the tender age of 11 by a trusted and beloved teacher. By the time he was 30 years old he was unconsciously displacing his rage into violence, sexual self-harm and long bouts of debilitating depression. After failing to find a solution to his burgeoning mania in all the conventional places, he set off on a Campbellian quest to find the answers for himself: about abuse, about the aftermath of abuse, about the true meaning of forgiveness, its metaphysical power, and how it is possible to heal, no matter how deep or how old the wound. The author assures us that "there is treasure in the ruins", "there can be profit in sorrow and in suffering", and, with a few tried and tested, honest techniques and a heavy supply of courage, victims can reclaim their lives, they can win love and they can find healing and inspiration, post-abuse. In this deeply empirical study, Thompson reveals the true definition and the awesome power of forgiveness, clearly defining the difference between forgiving someone and letting them off. He demonstrates the power and freedom of "giving it over"; the revealed health benefits of releasing anger, dissonance and resentment; the hidden power of reciprocity; avoiding the hate trap; the healing power of love and compassion; the liberating practice of personal repentance; and discovering "the world to come" - the exhilarating expansion we experience when ignorance is dissolved with qualified knowledge. "I told my story very late", Thompson tells us, "and suffered needlessly as a consequence; I'm hoping that 99 Reasons to Forgive will encourage others to share their story sooner, be inspired by my living example of powerful healing, and embrace their walking wounds as beauty scars, the rich tapestry of personal survival".
Archbishop Desmond Tutu, Nobel Peace Prize winner, Chair of The Elders, and Chair of South Africa’s Truth and Reconciliation Commission, along with his daughter, the Reverend Mpho Tutu, offer a manual on the art of forgiveness—helping us to realize that we are all capable of healing and transformation. Tutu's role as the Chair of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission taught him much about forgiveness. If you asked anyone what they thought was going to happen to South Africa after apartheid, almost universally it was predicted that the country would be devastated by a comprehensive bloodbath. Yet, instead of revenge and retribution, this new nation chose to tread the difficult path of confession, forgiveness, and reconciliation. Each of us has a deep need to forgive and to be forgiven. After much reflection on the process of forgiveness, Tutu has seen that there are four important steps to healing: Admitting the wrong and acknowledging the harm; Telling one's story and witnessing the anguish; Asking for forgiveness and granting forgiveness; and renewing or releasing the relationship. Forgiveness is hard work. Sometimes it even feels like an impossible task. But it is only through walking this fourfold path that Tutu says we can free ourselves of the endless and unyielding cycle of pain and retribution. The Book of Forgiving is both a touchstone and a tool, offering Tutu's wise advice and showing the way to experience forgiveness. Ultimately, forgiving is the only means we have to heal ourselves and our aching world.
Revised and expanded edition of Arnold's book 'Seventy times seven' (Plough 1997).
Pastor and New York Times bestselling author Timothy Keller outlines the reasons why forgiveness has to be a central part of everyone’s lives. Forgiving anyone in a meaningful way is one of the hardest things a person has to do. If you do not, resentment and vengeance begin to consume you. It is nearly impossible to move past transgression without forgiveness, but few people have the resources and the tools to forgive others fully and move on with their lives. Forgiveness is an essential skill, a moral imperative, and a religious belief that cuts right to the core of what it means to be human. In Forgive, Timothy Keller shows readers why it is so important and how to do it, explaining in detail the steps you need to take in order to move on without sacrificing justice or your humanity.
Too many of us feel trapped in stagnant romantic, family, or workplace relationships. Weighed down by toxic thoughts and emotions, we might be quick to judge and slow to pardon, and self-righteous about our feelings as we dwell on memories of what we or others did (or failed to do). In this tradepaper edition, Iyanla Vanzant challenges us to liberate ourselves from the wounds of the past and to embrace the new power of forgiveness. With Iyanla’s 21-Day Forgiveness Plan, you’ll explore relationship dynamics with your parents, children, friends, partners, co-workers, bosses, yourself, and even God. With journaling work and Emotional Freedom Techniques (also known as "tapping"), you’ll learn to live with more love; gain new clarity on your life, lessons, and blessings; and discover a new level of personal freedom, peace, and well-being. Forgiveness doesn’t mean agreeing with, condoning, or even liking what has happened. Forgiveness means letting go and knowing that—regardless of how challenging, frightening, or difficult an experience may seem—everything is just as it needs to be in order for you to grow and learn. When you focus on how things "should" be, you deny the presence and power of love. Accept the events of the past, while being willing to change your perspective on them. As Iyanla says, "Only forgiveness can liberate minds and hearts once held captive by anger, bitterness, resentment, and fear. Forgiveness is a true path to freedom that can renew faith, build trust, and nourish the soul."
Whether giving or receiving, forgiveness is the key toward true healing and blessing. God says there are no limits to forgiveness toward others or ourselves. And when Matthew West set out on a journey asking people to share their true life stories, Renée shared about how she chose to forgive the drunk driver who hit and killed her daughter. This remarkable story and others like it bring peace and healing to the one needing and the ones giving forgiveness. Fifty powerful stories share forgiveness through divorce, betrayal, addiction, abandonment, death, and more. Each story ties into the promises of God’s faithfulness and healing, and ends with the story of God’s ultimate forgiveness through the message of salvation.
For young children, learning to forgive—when they’ve been let down or had their feelings are hurt—can take time. Help children develop their forgiveness skills and learn how to accept an apology and move on without holding grudges. At the same time, encourage children to let go of disappointment and to accept when things don’t go the way they hope. Back matter includes advice for teaching forgiveness at home, at school, and in childcare. Being the Best Me!® Series From the author of the popular Learning to Get Along® books comes a one-of-a-kind character-development series. Each of the first six books in the Being the Best Me! series helps children learn, understand, and develop attitudes and positive character traits that strengthen self-confidence and a sense of purpose. Each book focuses on a specific attitude or character trait—optimism, self-esteem, assertiveness, resilience, integrity, and forgiveness. Also included are discussion questions, games, activities, and additional information for adults. Filled with diversity, these social story books will be welcome in school, home, and childcare settings.
The establishment of South Africa's Truth and Reconciliation Commission was a pioneering international event. Never had any country sought to move forward from despotism to democracy both by exposing the atrocities committed in the past and achieving reconciliation with its former oppressors. At the center of this unprecedented attempt at healing a nation has been Archbishop Desmond Tutu, whom President Nelson Mandela named as Chairman of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission. With the final report of the Commission just published, Archbishop Tutu offers his reflections on the profound wisdom he has gained by helping usher South Africa through this painful experience. In No Future Without Forgiveness, Tutu argues that true reconciliation cannot be achieved by denying the past. But nor is it easy to reconcile when a nation "looks the beast in the eye." Rather than repeat platitudes about forgiveness, he presents a bold spirituality that recognizes the horrors people can inflict upon one another, and yet retains a sense of idealism about reconciliation. With a clarity of pitch born out of decades of experience, Tutu shows readers how to move forward with honesty and compassion to build a newer and more humane world.
The Path to Forgiveness Study Guide is designed as a companion to the book, The Path to Forgiveness, to help you look deeper into the forgiveness process and find the peace and healing you need from interpersonal conflict and pain. In addition to the quotes, narratives, reflection questions, and affirmations in the book, this study guide also incorporates biblical references and thoughtful questions for further application and insight. You can use this study guide, along with The Path to Forgiveness, at a pace that is comfortable to you so that you can move forward from the unjust suffering you have experienced. This study guide can also be used in small groups to lead you and others down the path to forgiveness over a forty-day or eight-week period as you seek to restore meaning and direction to your life.
Ko-i Bastis is a Buddhist chaplain and in her book she helps readers reflect on what forgiveness really means and how it can heal their lives and relationships. She explores the difficult emotions that keep people from forgiving and offers tools to help us overcome them.